Stopping the Rain

I once heard that if you don’t want people to rain on your parade, don’t tell them what street it is on. To me that means that others will always try and find a way to poke holes in your happiness. If you don’t tell them the source they don’t know what direction in which to aim. Right now I am very happy. Content with life. I have a tough summer of studying ahead of me but my future looks so bright to me right now. I know everything will be okay. My boy and I are doing well. I told you what the situation is but I’ve decided to go back to being 100% true to myself and following my heart instead of my head. In reality, my heart and my head are really not at odds. Logically, he’s good choice too in addition to the fact that my heart is ready to be with him. Consistently he still gives me the attention I crave and deserve and he still treats me better than gold. I still find myself open to falling in love with him so by all means I am happy where my heart is. It is funny to me that although we don’t hold titles when other guys call me or want to hang out, I feel a certain loyalty to my boy and my heart is not inclined to chill with anyone else. I like that. Oh yea, I saw the ex this weekend. We played nice. He spoke I spoke. Of course him and the best friend were hanging out hard but I just kind of chilled. By no means do I want him to feel like there is animosity between us but by no means are we cool. Thankfully my heart has finally gotten over his betrayal but I am not a fool. The way he got me last time was by convincing me that we were ‘friends’ and that we’ve both moved past the break up. I am not falling for that s*** again. You can’t play me more than once and get away with it. And as for his friend girl (not girlfriend, lol), it’s whatever. I don’t particularly care for any of them but what can I do except be the bigger woman and be cordial when they speak and always make sure I put my best foot forward. If I were Tomi’s age I can go around cursing people out and telling them to kiss my *** with no remorse and no consequences to my action but I am a professional in every sense of the word and I intend to compose myself accordingly. This weekend was fun. It actually tripped me out that I did not want to leave the house because I did not want to leave my boy. If given a choice I would have just stayed snuggled up with him like I was instead of going to that party. The party was okay but it does not beat spending quality time with someone you care about. I have informed the necessary parties about the new developments in my life but as far as the rest of the world is concerned, my single status is in tact. I don’t want anyone raining on my parade so I refuse to tell them what street it is on.

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