Thought Wrong

Meeting you when I was in my first year of college, signified that we could probably be friends for that year. But then that one meeting turned to hours on the phone. Hours on the phone turned to making plans to meet up on our next trips. No, not romantically involved but definitely the best of friends. I thought we were friends. I thought because you called me every night before you go to sleep. Or told me about the various women in your life, which ones were important and which ones were not, I thought that meant we were friends. I thought because I called you when something funny happened to me or someone pissed me off, and you either laughed at me or talked me down, either way making me feel better, I thought that meant that we were friends. I thought that spending the same weekend every year together, planning which day we would hang out. Staying up talking till 6am in the morning. Getting your friends and my friends together and having a great time doing nothing at all, I thought that meant we were friends. I thought being able to count on you to call me on every birthday, and me counting down to midnight on your special day. Calling each other every Thanksgiving, New Years, Christmas and all other holidays in between, I thought that meant that we were friends. I thought having someone who could make me laugh even when I felt like crying meant that we were friends. I thought that keeping our friendship going from my last year in high school till my last year in college meant that we were friends. I thought that you wanting to date my friend and asking me about her and telling me what you thought was a good thing. I thought that it meant that we were friends. I thought that you and her getting together would only bring us closer because I thought that you and I were friends. Now, I know better. I know that you treat me as if you only needed me to get to her. And once you were done with her, you were done with me. I know that you don’t acknowledge any day that is special to me anymore. I know that we can be in the same city now and not even speak to each other. I know that regardless of how many years I thought that we were friends, my friendship wasn’t worth that much to you. I know that even when you go years without saying a word to me, you may still find time to speak to the friends I introduced you to. I thought that we were friends. But I know better now. I thought wrong.

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