Being faithful to the things God has been doing in my life required me to take my attention off the things I use to long after (love and marriage) and just pursue the things of God. There seems to be a new season in my life now where I’m being required to learn to pursue God in the midst of a relationship that pleases Him. The only question I have is directed to myself. Am I ready? Am I consistent enough to keep a dynamic prayer life and bible study and still invest time in a relationship? Am I strong enough to continue to be who I know God has called me to be in the midst of my first attempt at a relationship that glorifies God? Am I able to withstand the stress and hardship that comes with putting someone else’s needs before my own?
I have no answers to any of those questions. I’m just trying to remain as prayerful as possible, paying attention to the signs of my maturity (or lack thereof) in Christ to handle a situation like this one. My prayer is that if for any reason, I am not ready, God will grant me the grace as He did two years ago, to recognize that His will is not being done and to step away. For now, I’m praying, seeking godly counsel and paying attention to the move of the Holy Spirit and to the kinds of fruit this situation is bearing in me. Keep me in your prayers. The last thing I want to do is serve my emotions rather than serving God.